For most of my life, I’ve been convinced that happiness depends upon your own independence. Financial independence, yes. But emotional independence too – the strength to stand alone on something, to not rely on others for your sense of purpose. I’ve always lived that way. I’ve moved to new cities with a pretty slim bank account because I knew it was the right place for me. I’ve struck it out alone, and been proud of it, even when I had zero friends and stayed home reading every Saturday night. But eventually I know I will want to give up a portion of that independence – for a really cute Guy. :)
My ING-Account is still nick-named just “Business School Savings,” but that’s just to preserve the illusion of self-respect. I'm saving for grad school expenses. But I’m really more excited about saving for the frou-frou white dress. I want Vera. I want the sit-down dinner. And naturally, in my independent way, I want to finance it myself. My parents gave me the financial support to graduate from a great undergraduate institution without any student loans. I simply won’t allow them to pay for cake for three hundred of my friends too.
According to the wedding budget calculator, I will need upwards of $10-20K dollars to have the wedding I’m dreaming of. Right now it’s sitting at $0 because it tends to be the last priority. (I mean, I don’t exactly have a ring.) But I need to save anyway if I’m serious about this goal. So, I’m starting small and my new goal, now that the Dog Fund is over, is to filter away at least $100 a month.
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Best Roommate Ever
Just to follow up on that post after moving in with the Guy….
We’re pretty happy :)
We’re pretty happy :)
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Vesting 401(k) Quandary with soon-to-be "Former" Company
Doh. Truly a Homer Simpson moment for me today. When I was checking my company-held 401(k) balance the other day, I suddenly had what shouldn’t have been a shocking revelation. There were two little lines there.
Current Balance: $12,765.66
Vested Balance: $8,658.28
Suddenly the financial-speak scales fell off and I saw what it meant for me:
Vested Balance: my money
Current Balance: NOT my money YET
Somewhere the HR aside of a “5-year-vest for company matching funds” came trickling back into my ear. Oops. I do plan on leaving this company when I go to business school. And that will mean walking away from, at this point, $$4,107 of what would have been my money. Certainly not something that would sway my decision. In fact, because my company will sponsor me for business school if I so choose to come back for three years afterwards, I will in fact, probably be walking away from $10,000+ dollars (when I subtract the difference I’d probably get in financial aid anyway). But I will never let money make choices for me that could make me much less happy in the long run. And that’s the point of money anyway, right? Allowing you the freedom to do the things that make you happy.
Now that I’m on the subject though, I’m wondering if, knowing now that I won’t continue with the company (I wasn’t sure of this when I first enrolled in the 401(k) plan of course), if I should lower my contribution on my work 401(k) and put more money into the Roth. I didn’t invest the maximum contribution last year, although I might come closer this year. Seems like a reasonable thing to do… just to make sure I’ll contact my advisor. But if anyone has made a similar choice – please leave me a comment!
Current Balance: $12,765.66
Vested Balance: $8,658.28
Suddenly the financial-speak scales fell off and I saw what it meant for me:
Vested Balance: my money
Current Balance: NOT my money YET
Somewhere the HR aside of a “5-year-vest for company matching funds” came trickling back into my ear. Oops. I do plan on leaving this company when I go to business school. And that will mean walking away from, at this point, $$4,107 of what would have been my money. Certainly not something that would sway my decision. In fact, because my company will sponsor me for business school if I so choose to come back for three years afterwards, I will in fact, probably be walking away from $10,000+ dollars (when I subtract the difference I’d probably get in financial aid anyway). But I will never let money make choices for me that could make me much less happy in the long run. And that’s the point of money anyway, right? Allowing you the freedom to do the things that make you happy.
Now that I’m on the subject though, I’m wondering if, knowing now that I won’t continue with the company (I wasn’t sure of this when I first enrolled in the 401(k) plan of course), if I should lower my contribution on my work 401(k) and put more money into the Roth. I didn’t invest the maximum contribution last year, although I might come closer this year. Seems like a reasonable thing to do… just to make sure I’ll contact my advisor. But if anyone has made a similar choice – please leave me a comment!
Saturday, April 26, 2008
The Story of Stuff
I’ve been a bit spotty of late, but I just got back from a really great two-day conference for work on sustainability. I must admit that I’ve never been someone anyone would call eco-conscious. Sure I recycle and I’ve seen Al Gore’s power point, but I’ve never made demonstrable changes in my life. The past two days had their ups and downs, but the overall effect was profound. Not that I left all granola, in tears and vowing to make my condo carbon-neutral. But a lot of things clicked about my own views and thoughts on sustainability, and I left with a picture of the world that matches up with what I see everyday.
It links back to an episode I had a month or so back in San Francisco. When I told my friend over dinner that I wrote a personal finance blog, she looked a bit stumped and then ventured, “So you would write, say, ‘Oh man, I went to Starbucks today and had a latte and I really shouldn’t have.’ That kind of thing?” And while this is occasionally the scope of what I write about, I was deeply offended.
It hit that personal pride thing. My friend makes more money than I do. In college, this of course wasn’t the case, and we both came from the same middle class families. Her comment was an affront to my personal pride. She implied that I was miserly, watching my pennies, denying myself the latest trend in retail.
But the principles I espouse here are not just about reducing spending to be thrifty, but also about reducing the value you derive for yourself from buying stuff. To expound, stuff is just STUFF and I want to make sure that it never defines me. As nice as it is to have nice things, enjoy music and experiences that cost money, it is not me. Part of this new revelation came from seeing Annie Leonard’s Story of Stuff film. Here she investigates the consumptive patterns and rituals we observe America and the “work—watch—spend” cycle we get roped into. It’s true… as she says, the first thing President Bush told us to do after 9/11 wasn’t to grieve or hope or get involved, it was to BUY STUFF. He appeared in advertisements telling us to go back to our normal lives, go shopping, keep the economy afloat. No wonder all of our ego satisfaction comes from this same stuff.
The first reaction to watching the Story of stuff is to put a moratorium on all spending and to seek out sustainable everything, sustainable toothpaste and reading lamps and beach towels. But as Adam Werbach instructed us at the conference, it’s not about what you do or don’t do, but about how much, and to what degree you’re doing these things. In short, sustainability is about balance and it’s about being a perpetual student, learning where stuff comes from and how the choices you make influence the world. And that is the kind of non-granola vision that I can subscribe to. So I haven’t made any unattainable commitments; I’m just thinking about balance and how I can rethink my attachments to my STUFF. Believe me, I have them…
It links back to an episode I had a month or so back in San Francisco. When I told my friend over dinner that I wrote a personal finance blog, she looked a bit stumped and then ventured, “So you would write, say, ‘Oh man, I went to Starbucks today and had a latte and I really shouldn’t have.’ That kind of thing?” And while this is occasionally the scope of what I write about, I was deeply offended.
It hit that personal pride thing. My friend makes more money than I do. In college, this of course wasn’t the case, and we both came from the same middle class families. Her comment was an affront to my personal pride. She implied that I was miserly, watching my pennies, denying myself the latest trend in retail.
But the principles I espouse here are not just about reducing spending to be thrifty, but also about reducing the value you derive for yourself from buying stuff. To expound, stuff is just STUFF and I want to make sure that it never defines me. As nice as it is to have nice things, enjoy music and experiences that cost money, it is not me. Part of this new revelation came from seeing Annie Leonard’s Story of Stuff film. Here she investigates the consumptive patterns and rituals we observe America and the “work—watch—spend” cycle we get roped into. It’s true… as she says, the first thing President Bush told us to do after 9/11 wasn’t to grieve or hope or get involved, it was to BUY STUFF. He appeared in advertisements telling us to go back to our normal lives, go shopping, keep the economy afloat. No wonder all of our ego satisfaction comes from this same stuff.
The first reaction to watching the Story of stuff is to put a moratorium on all spending and to seek out sustainable everything, sustainable toothpaste and reading lamps and beach towels. But as Adam Werbach instructed us at the conference, it’s not about what you do or don’t do, but about how much, and to what degree you’re doing these things. In short, sustainability is about balance and it’s about being a perpetual student, learning where stuff comes from and how the choices you make influence the world. And that is the kind of non-granola vision that I can subscribe to. So I haven’t made any unattainable commitments; I’m just thinking about balance and how I can rethink my attachments to my STUFF. Believe me, I have them…
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Weekend Luxuries
A non-money related post on how much I live for the weekend. This has been an incredible one. An entire weekend spent with the Guy, went to a food & wine show and scored lots of free samples, tasted fabulous wines, ate out at a cool new restaurant in town, Guy's treat, slept in, watched a Lost marathon on the couch, went to brunch, saw friends, met new people, more wine, making cupcakes today, hosting an Oscar party tonight.... pretty perfect.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Everyone's a Little Bit Shiftless.
Recently I went to see a production of the fabulous Tony-award winning musical, Avenue Q, with the Guy. All I knew going in was “dirty puppets” but came away in awe. I felt more than a little implicated, since I embody the protagonist – a young twenty-something with a BA in English, living on her own in the city, trying to navigate friends, relationships and yes – my purpose in life. And of course, it made me think of this blog and the financial escalators that weave throughout those journeys.
The basic conclusion at the end of Avenue Q: feel better, no one has found purpose in life! Just like the musical’s hit song “Everyone’s a little bit racist,” they could have ended with “Everyone’s a little bit shiftless.” While everyone is all smiles at the end of the puppet play, this just makes me feel worse. I can admit the truth of the whole schadenfreude thing. When I look at the plight of Gary Coleman, or other pf bloggers who are farther behind than I am, I can sometimes be cheered up. Hey, I don’t have it so bad. But I will admit – there are times when I cannot blog away the depression of looking at my tiny little bank account. Or working in a job that doesn’t truly fulfill me, when I could be writing. We live in a consumer-driven world, and nice things aren’t just luxuries sometimes. Sometimes, they get wrapped up into our purpose. [How can you not afford the restaurant when you’re a foodie? Or the concert when you’re the music girl?? etc.]
In order to deal with this, I’m countering Avenue Q with a bit of positive psychology. I took a course in college on happiness, which I thought was a total crock back then. But now I’m surprised at the amount of time I’ve spent thinking back on these principles of thinking positively and trying to be a happier person (really).
1. Give yourself permission to be human.
2. Pursue the intersection of pleasure and meaning. When that isn’t possible, use happiness boosters to tide you over until you can find this place.
3. Focus on the positive.
4. Simplify.
5. Regular exercise / healthy eating / sufficient sleep.
6. Express gratitude whenever possible.
The basic conclusion at the end of Avenue Q: feel better, no one has found purpose in life! Just like the musical’s hit song “Everyone’s a little bit racist,” they could have ended with “Everyone’s a little bit shiftless.” While everyone is all smiles at the end of the puppet play, this just makes me feel worse. I can admit the truth of the whole schadenfreude thing. When I look at the plight of Gary Coleman, or other pf bloggers who are farther behind than I am, I can sometimes be cheered up. Hey, I don’t have it so bad. But I will admit – there are times when I cannot blog away the depression of looking at my tiny little bank account. Or working in a job that doesn’t truly fulfill me, when I could be writing. We live in a consumer-driven world, and nice things aren’t just luxuries sometimes. Sometimes, they get wrapped up into our purpose. [How can you not afford the restaurant when you’re a foodie? Or the concert when you’re the music girl?? etc.]
In order to deal with this, I’m countering Avenue Q with a bit of positive psychology. I took a course in college on happiness, which I thought was a total crock back then. But now I’m surprised at the amount of time I’ve spent thinking back on these principles of thinking positively and trying to be a happier person (really).
1. Give yourself permission to be human.
2. Pursue the intersection of pleasure and meaning. When that isn’t possible, use happiness boosters to tide you over until you can find this place.
3. Focus on the positive.
4. Simplify.
5. Regular exercise / healthy eating / sufficient sleep.
6. Express gratitude whenever possible.
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