January Read/Bought Review

A very good month for furthering my bookshelf... not all of these I bought, some of these I was actually given. Best gifts!

BOUGHT
Hateship, Frienship, Courtship, Loveship, Marriage - Alice Munro
A Worldly Country - John Ashbery
Howard's End - EM Forster
The Five People you meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom
Dress your Family in Corduroy and Denim - David Sedaris
Eat, Pray, Love - Elizabeth Gilbert

READ
A Worldly Country - John Ashbery
Eat, Pray, Love - Elizabeth Gilbert

I love Ashbery's poems - one of my favorites was my comissioned for my city and resides on a bridge I ride underneath every week. Eat, Pray, Love was so different than what I normally read, and there were parts of it that took solipsism to a whole new height (for crying out loud, I read four pages about the author's bladder infection), but there were also true gems of wisdom and revelations about happiness. My favorite quote:

"All the sorrow in the world is caused by unhappy people. Not only in
the big global Hitler'n'Stalin picture, but also on the smallest personal
level. Even in my own life, I can see exactly where my episodes of
unhappiness have brought suffering or distress or at the very least
inconvenience to those aroud me. The search for contentment is, therefore,
not merely a self-preserving and self-benefiting act, but also a generous gift
to the world. Clearing out all your misery gets you out of the way. You
cease being an obstacle, not only to yourself but to everyone else."

Frugal Food + a Plea for Cheap Entertainment...

Forgot to add my little boast that to top the Guy's crepes yesterday, I managed a veritable feast this morning using the few hodge-podge ingredients in the pantry/fridge: Baked Apple Oatmeal, Homestyle Southern Cheese Grits and Breakfast Burritos with Corn Salsa. The oatmeal was an amazing weekend treat... one of those that looks gourmet when it isn't:

Mix:
2 packets instant Quaker oatmeal
1/2 apple chopped
few raisins/dried fruit if you've got them
1/3 cup brown sugar
titch of salt & cinnamon
1.5 cups milk

Bake at 350 for 30 min. Serve with applesauce, more milk, honey, whatever you've got...

Also, a plea: my mother and grandparents (emphysema, one bad knee + one worsening case of Alzheimer's) are coming into town next weekend for a visit. The easy answer would be to buy up theater tickets and book pricey restaurants galore, but that would definitely combat my plan to limit nonessentials. Any suggestions for entertaining Nana and PawPaw on the cheap?

Luxury vs. Necessity

Yay! $1000 closer to paying off my credit card! Also applied for a Citicard today though I wont be doing any real spending on it... just trying to improve my debt-to-available-credit ratio.

I found this article in the NYTimes today to be a very funny commentary on our ability to limit nonessentials. I've decided my new goal for Feb is to do just that - cut out all luxuries and limit the nonessentials to see how much I can save next month. Not sure what the right $ amt is but this will be a trial month and I will post updates along the way. Just my attempt to be hyperaware of what I'm spending. Only for one month anyway!

Crepes and Canvases

This morning instead of our usual overpriced weekend brunches, the Guy made the most amazing crepes I've had. Light and fluffy with little bits of powdered sugar, honey and cinnamon. Very nice cap to our evening last night... his condo had an open house and we made the acquaintance of all his neighbors, one of which was this really inspiring writer and author, Rick. I was absolutely entranced with his paintings - they felt important and poetic and deeply funny. He said he's sidelined on painting for awhile and is writing a lot now, which is nice. I could identify with these mid-forties Dilbert looking character; underneath, there was just a lot to say. Garrison Keillor once said that creating art is one of the most optimistic acts you can undertake.

Rick said he had even sold lots of his paintings, some for around $800. Which definitely inspired me. I don't know how I'd go about finding a market, I've never sold any of my paintings or my stories yet. I've at least tried a lot with my stories, but painting is still my "just for fun" hobby. Still, our conversation left me feeling very optimistic that it is possible, to enjoy your own work and fulfill yourself, and still make your own way financially (his condo was the best on the tour, with an incredible view of the Minneapolis skyline). Also met a former rowing coach and a woman who worked at Aveda, so many unique individuals that were truly invested and active in striving towards their "purpose," rather than their "career." Truly refreshing... might rejuvenate me enough to start painting again! OR at least mailing in a few more short story submissions.

Blogging Can Save the World.

Being new to the blogging community in general, I find I have assumed the fanatical zeal of the newly converted... I feel like composing my very own Miss America style speech in which blogging away problems somehow brings about world peace. You mean, there are blogs for everything? I should start reading fitness blogs, Spanish-language blogs, blogs about my city, blogs on rowing and fashion and politics. Anything I want to learn about or adjust or change about myself I can achieve rather casually in my spare time through the overwhelming power of shared information, virtual accountability and persistence of posts!

My only gripe is that I haven't found an efficient way to search for these posts. Right now I'm googling topic + blogspot. Shouldn't there be a top-ten list of best blogs by category or somesuch more organized system?

Trading Up and Down

Target has done a fabulous job of capitalizing on the true consumer insight that people like to trade down in some areas so that they can save their money and trade up in others. People can do both at retailers like Target. But they're also mixing the concept across retailers. Shop for home decor at Target so you can shop for handbags at Gucci. You get to value what you value, and both retailers win. As a marketer, I've thought about this a lot in my professional life. Brand loyalty is irrational behavior, and yet, one of the most normal behaviors in our consumer culture. However, I rarely think about it in my personal life.

Where I've Traded Down:
Shampoo / Beauty Products - I buy Pantene shampoo instead of Aveda now, and drugstore makeup for the most part. The only place I trade up in makeup is foundation which is MAC. $30 a pop is expensive, but I felt like it was time I looked a little more grown-up (I used to wear tinted moisturizer only).
Coffee - Even though I'm really a coffee fanatic, I drink enough of it that I can't afford the premium stuff, so I've been sampling lots of private label (Archer Farms and Lunds&Byerlys).

Where I've Traded Up:
Moleskine – These notebooks range from $10-20 and yet I purchase them religiously when I have all the notebooks and legal pads I could ever desire in our office supply cabinet at work!
Cascadian Farm Organic Jam – I am a breakfast person. This is my toast indulgence. The purest, most natural flavors, but at a huge premium to regular Welch’s.

Time is Money Part II

When I first entered the corporate world, an important mentor in my life remarked casually: “You either have time or you have money. It’s one or the other – rarely both. Sometimes neither.” She said this to justify using our corporate concierge service for shoe repair, where you pay a premium for services that you could do cheaper or free by yourself, if you only had the time. I’m finding myself in that trade-off position all the time. But I wonder if there are other aspects which I can capitalize on more often: where do I have the time to do or research things my own or plan enough ahead to save money?

I found a great resource on the time vs. money conundrum here. A few of their very simple examples:
+ Gas – Pump on Tuesdays for the best deals of the week.
+ Vacations – Travel in the “shoulder seasons” (February in Europe, April in the Caribbean / ski country)
+ Bills – Pay online and save $70 a year on postage.

Everyone's a Little Bit Shiftless.

Recently I went to see a production of the fabulous Tony-award winning musical, Avenue Q, with the Guy. All I knew going in was “dirty puppets” but came away in awe. I felt more than a little implicated, since I embody the protagonist – a young twenty-something with a BA in English, living on her own in the city, trying to navigate friends, relationships and yes – my purpose in life. And of course, it made me think of this blog and the financial escalators that weave throughout those journeys.

The basic conclusion at the end of Avenue Q: feel better, no one has found purpose in life! Just like the musical’s hit song “Everyone’s a little bit racist,” they could have ended with “Everyone’s a little bit shiftless.” While everyone is all smiles at the end of the puppet play, this just makes me feel worse. I can admit the truth of the whole schadenfreude thing. When I look at the plight of Gary Coleman, or other pf bloggers who are farther behind than I am, I can sometimes be cheered up. Hey, I don’t have it so bad. But I will admit – there are times when I cannot blog away the depression of looking at my tiny little bank account. Or working in a job that doesn’t truly fulfill me, when I could be writing. We live in a consumer-driven world, and nice things aren’t just luxuries sometimes. Sometimes, they get wrapped up into our purpose. [How can you not afford the restaurant when you’re a foodie? Or the concert when you’re the music girl?? etc.]

In order to deal with this, I’m countering Avenue Q with a bit of positive psychology. I took a course in college on happiness, which I thought was a total crock back then. But now I’m surprised at the amount of time I’ve spent thinking back on these principles of thinking positively and trying to be a happier person (really).

1. Give yourself permission to be human.
2. Pursue the intersection of pleasure and meaning. When that isn’t possible, use happiness boosters to tide you over until you can find this place.
3. Focus on the positive.
4. Simplify.
5. Regular exercise / healthy eating / sufficient sleep.
6. Express gratitude whenever possible.

Time for Money

I became an E-Miles member not too long ago, and have been pleasantly surprised with the experience. Here’s how it works, you wade through marketing messages and respond to surveys so companies can gauge how interested your demographic will be in buying their products and services. They give you miles to be added to an airline account of your choice.

Do I feel bad about whoring myself out to consumerism, you ask? No. I am smarter than you, Company. I know what I want and what I don’t. You can’t convince me I need things. And I already have to wade through marketing messages so I might as well get some compensation for the hassle. Right now I have only amassed 320 miles (most surveys are worth 5-15 miles for your time) but I don’t mind too much that it’s filling up gradually. The surveys are fairly short and it gives me something arguably productive to do on those Friday afternoons at four when there is no way I’m going to be getting work done.

E-Poll or American Consumer Opinion surveys are two other resources you might want to try (compensation based instead of airline miles... cash or gift cards) in case you're into the concept.

Cashmere Mafia

In the middle of the writers’ strike, ABC has unveiled a new show about four driven professional women at the top of their industries (as far as I can make out thus far, a publisher of a major magazine-Lucy Liu, an executive at a national cosmetics company, and two high-powered other people…. consultant? i-banker? It’s a little unclear to me frankly. Hopefully more details will be revealed.) They are all doing well for themselves in the corporate world, but pretty hapless (normal?) women in all other aspects of their lives. I have to admit, as a sometimes-aspiring-businesswoman myself that I support the concept so much that I am willing to dismiss any deficiencies in the writing of the show itself. I don’t think the producers are really trying to instill any moral good in America... it seems to be Sex and the City + more business suits – one review called it "escapist fantasy pretending to be post modern feminist melodrama” – but it’s still refreshing to see images of females in power. I am curious to hear more background on how they got to be where they are. As of yet, their immaculately-made-up poker faces reveal nothing of the strain and perseverance of the corporate ladder climb…. not sure if the interests of realism will be served, we’ll wait to see how this plays out.

Blow-out Weekend

Tough weekend. Financially that is. Otherwise, it was great. The Guy's birthday was a lot of fun! Birthday dinner, double massages with a chocolate scrub, a night out after a Pats victory. A very sweet breakfast at the same place we had one of our first dates. But, I totalled up all of the gifts and expenses and I figured that everything came to over $800 (framing art for him, several dinners, a concert, a wine tasting, covering the bill for all those birthday shots at the bar, those massages). Gifts, especially for a significant other, have always been my weakness. I just want to give him something that he'll love and something that will convey his level of importance in my life. But I really can't afford what he can (he makes twice what I do). It's hard because I don't think all of the little things like buying less expensive groceries and taking my lunch to work are going to "make up" for $800. I hate having to think about money this much, and big blow-out weekends like this one make me do it. I'm going to try not to be a Scrooge for V-day, but I'll just have to set a b-u-d-g-e-t this time. Ick.

FICO score surprise

A few nights ago Suze Orman was on CNN and she clarified something I don’t think I was really aware of about credit scores. Your FICO is really about your debt to credit limit ratio, she says. By extension, it would seem like I’d want to have lots of various credit cards and have charged only a small amount one ach one. It doesn’t seem quite right to me – I’ve always operated with a kind of innate fear of credit cards in general, and so, I only have one (and it took me a long time to even consent to get one), and I make all my purchases on that one card. I think that despite it’s impact on my FICO score, part of this will never change about me because of the emotional impact that debt has on me. I’m really glad that Suze Orman touched on that too – beyond the numbers, if debt makes you squirm (like it does me) then it’s best to get rid of it all and do whatever you need to do to eliminate it.
I don’t think I will make any immediate changes now, but since I’m already shopping for a better credit card, I think I won’t close the one I have now when I do – I’ll pay off a tank of gas on each one to keep them alive. I remember now that my financial advisor said that he did that when I first met him quite some time ago.
But I’d welcome thoughts and comments from those with a more sophisticated understanding of it than myself.

Plus, a link to a Forbes article on Mint.com that I wrote about last.

Mint.com

If you haven’t checked this out already, the Guy turned me onto this Mint.com site. Is essentially intended to be the “Quicken” for this generation. It’s a free online service that helps track your spending by category – restaurants, travel, etc. It also has a feature which tells you how you can save money by switching your financial institution. It was a little cryptic to me exactly where those “Save $175” figures came from, and I don’t think I’ll be switching over, especially because the phrasing “personalized offer” scares me, especially online. Right now it’s just a Beta version, so it could get better… but I’ll be using it as just a personal resource to track spending on the small stuff. (Over $500 at restaurants for November and December!!! Yikes.)

New Leaf.

In the South where I grew up, we always have the traditional New Year’s day menu of luck, money & love: black-eyed peas for luck, collard greens for money, pork chops for love (don’t ask me – red meat, I guess?) Hard to stomach, but hey – it’s tradition.
My Resolutions for 2008:
1) Carve out more time for my writing – 5 pgs or 5 hrs / week. When I set out into the corporate world instead of getting my MFA, I figured I would have the best of both worlds – financial stability and time to write. I have found that at entry level, I don’t really have either. When I leave work, though I may have a few hours left in the day, I have the mental energy to microwave something while Anderson Cooper gives me the news. My novel collects dust. Or rather, my laptop does. So I’m hoping to set aside more time to write, whether it’s leaving early one night a week, or more likely – devoting a weekend morning. I desperately need a new routine.
2) Burn No Bridges. The older I get, the more I am learning the truth in Faulkner: "The past isn't dead-it isn't even past." More and more people come into my life that I was thankful to have washed my hands of. Not that I’m the kind of person to throw down torches. But it seems like there’s always someone who I didn’t even try to keep in touch with, or someone that I was rude to because I thought I would never have to deal with again. No longer. I am going to reach out to everyone, try to maintain contacts as long as it is socially feasible and bring out my best Southern belle act, even when I have a hard time getting along with someone. Because you never know.
3) Monthly Financial Review. I used to hate to think about money. I still don’t really care for it. But I am realizing how important it is not to be blind to the true state of affairs of my finances. Not knowing what the numbers are doesn’t change anything and it doesn’t make it better. I’m hoping this blog will help me with monthly tracking. Now I like to think about it more broadly. By starting this, I’m asserting that it’s normal to develop ulcers about finances, but that it’s the responsible thing to track them and get better. Provided I continue to monitor my budget and make sound choices, I will never make less money than I do now. My net worth can only increase!